diary entry

So, a long time ago when we actually read the book, we were asked to then  reread it just looking at the personal diary entries in order. being that i imagined myself posting this blog when i actually reread the diary entries, its hard for me to look back and remember what i actually thought of it instead of rereading them all a third time.The first time, i didn't pay any mind to these entries, and didn't see any correlation between them.... But in fact, they all actually were posted on the same day, october 12. his birthday (for some reason i feel the need to also write that this is my sister's birthday... so here you go, thats also my sisters birthday!) well except for the first one, which was from march. that diary entry isn't important. it only talks about the whole reason he is doing the blog, the publishing deal.  this is sarcasm,  because i don't know how to relate that entry to the rest. oh wait, now that i think about it i do. that same day was the day of the car accident and his beloved geraldine died. 

then, all the rest of the entries are pretty much him ranting about that night, and all his emotions built up.  they are all snippets of one long diary entry. validation- "i have done nothing wrong, i keep telling myself that". yearn- "nothing you do or say takes back a moment". its obvious through that ben peek was feeling pretty shitty and down in the dumps when he wrote those diary entries. as i quoted in 'yearn', he pretty much has realized that nothing he does or says he will never be able to go back to that moment of the accident that night. he can't forgive himself for it. poor ben. i did enjoy reading his diary entries more than the actual other entries. they've got emotion. well, the dialogues did too.