a real vulnerability

I must first start this with, please no matter your personal feelings, understand I am putting myself out here now. I am exposing myself and letting some of my vulnerability show through. I hope you all will be willing to respect that.

I am a Christian. I may not be the best at it, I don't know the bible that well, I don't always follow Jesus' word, I certainly still sin. Yet I try to become a better Christian, and the kind of person that God wishes me to be every single day. This weekend, I went to a fall conference for Inter Varsity, a Christian group on campus. Our mission statement is "Encounter Jesus and revolutionize the world with love, service and justice". While I was there I thought a lot about my life and what I am doing with it. We were told that if we haven't experienced butterflies in our stomach because of something we did for Jesus, then we are not really living our lives for Jesus. This is my butterflies. I realized that for me to do what I truly wish to do, and that is give my life to God, then I must be willing to expose my beliefs to others.

A part of me is ashamed to tell someone "I believe in God, I believe in His word, His mission, everything." Especially if I am not certain that the person I am talking to is a Christian. I can't be living the life that Jesus wishes me to live, if I won't confess my love for Him.

Even now, while exposing myself to a very real vulnerability, I am staying safe. I am typing this on a computer and posting it online. Yet I am not going up to someone I know, or even to someone I don't know and saying to them, I believe in God, and I wish to share his word with you. There is  no actual human interaction required for me to do this.

If anyone feels a need or wishes to learn more about God, Jesus and Inter Varsity I am here to talk to if you want. I can try and point you in the beginning of the right direction, I can give you a sense of community with other Christians, and I can help you start a journey that will last you all this life, and follow you into the next.

I am finally willing to stand up, and say I believe in the Lord.